


When My Time Is Up (Have I Done Enough?)

by bdiddy150 (dismalspacenoodle)



Category: 18th Century CE RPF, Hamilton - Miranda
Genre: Character Study, Drabble, Letters, eh? sorta?, hahaha can you tell im still salty about maria, i love her but wyd alex, im adding these tags as they appear, so if a character isn't tagged it doesn't mean they won't be in this at some point
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-07-08
Updated: 2016-07-08
Packaged: 2018-07-22 05:59:07
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 4
Words: 1,287
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7422622
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/dismalspacenoodle/pseuds/bdiddy150
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>It's a look inside the character's minds, prompted by my c&c prep teacher making us write a god damn encyclopedia on what we want in life.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Alexander Hamilton

**Author's Note:**

> This was originally going to be one long chapter, but then I realized its boring as hell to sift through a million characters to see the ones you care about.

_Please, state your name._

My name is Alexander Hamilton.

 

_What is success to you?_

Success is coming from nowhere as nobody and becoming a great man in a great place. Success is a reward for your work, success is shouting into a crowd and being heard by all. Success is living by what you believe in and dying for what is right. Success is placing your head in the hangman’s noose and walking away with a million dollars. Success isn’t surviving everything life throws at you, it’s living with your head held high, dying with honor, and never fading from the minds of the country. Success is refusing to fall to your knees even when a gun is pointed at your head, and it is creating something that cannot be washed away by the seas of time. Success is throwing not a stone but an unmoving boulder into the vast river of the ideals of our world, changing the current forever and resisting all that try to move it.

 

_Would you say you achieved what you wanted to in your life? Would you say you have succeeded, by your definition of the word?_

I didn’t live nearly long enough to do everything I wanted to do, but yes, I would say that I succeeded. I rose from being a bastard in the Caribbean to Secretary of the Treasury, right hand man of George Washington, and created the national banks. I have done more than anyone expected of me.

 

_Do you have any regrets?_

I have three regrets in total; I regret Miss Maria Reynolds and everything I had done to her, I regret failing to see my son grow up because of a blunder I made in giving him that gun and telling him to aim for the sky, and I regret raising a gun towards the sky instead of at Aaron Burr, robbing me of the rest of my life and robbing the country of what I could’ve done. Other than that, I have pushed for what I wanted until I got it until my final breath, and I cannot regret such a feat in any circumstance.


	2. Elizabeth Schuyler Hamilton

_Please, state your name._

My name is Elizabeth Schuyler Hamilton.

 

_What is success to you?_

To me? Well, it’s… it’s looking around you, and seeing everyone you’ve helped, I dare say. It’s looking into the eyes of your children—not just the ones you bore, of course, but the ones you _raised_ —and seeing their love and affection, the happiness you have helped create; walking outside your door and seeing everything you’ve made possible. I suppose success is being happy with what you’ve done, and using your life to make others’ worth living.

 

_Would you say you achieved what you wanted to in your life? Would you say you have succeeded, by your definition of the word?_

Did I achieve what I want? I intend not to be ungrateful or presumptuous, but no, I don’t believe so. I wanted to make my father happy, and I turned around and married a dirt-broke immigrant, I wanted to make Alexander content and I failed at that, too, didn’t I? I married the man my sister loved and my father despised, only to have him invite a married woman into our bed. I could never live up to my husband’s work. But… yes, I think I’ve succeeded, because I may not have done all that I wished to do, but I did all I could, and I thank God every day that He blessed me with what I was able to give.

 

_Do you have any regrets?_

I regret every moment I didn’t spend with Philip, every moment I wasted being cross with Alexander when I should’ve counted every second as the gift it was. Despite all the pain I caused and felt, and all the heartbreak, though, I could never regret telling my sister that Alexander Hamilton was mine.


	3. Angelica Schuyler Church

_Please, state your name._

My name is Angelica Schuyler Church.

 

_What is success to you?_

Ha! What is success to me? Getting what you want, of course.

_Is that… all?_

I—no. Success is achieving your goals, and doing so with integrity. If you haven’t live with your head held high and your feet on the ground, no matter what you do, it can’t be “successful”, can it? Stumbling and cheating your way to a smoke-and-mirrors finale of a happy ending, you haven’t accomplished anything at all, other than living, breathing, and dying a parody of a life. You need to bring about your own future by snatching it from the endless expanse of probability, do whatever it takes to build that dream into a reality.

 

_Would you say you achieved what you wanted to in your life? Would you say you have succeeded, by your definition of the word?_

I would, in fact. To both of those questions. I pushed my way through masses of sexism and made my life known; founded a city in New York, advised both Mister Franklin and Mister Jefferson, supported my sister until the day I died, and I am not ashamed to say I take immense pride in what I’ve done with the time I’ve been granted on this earth.

 

_Do you have any regrets?_

I once said I would regret a certain night for the rest of my days—the night I dragged an unsuspecting immigrant to the most beautiful and intelligent woman he would ever lay eyes on. But my days are over, now, and if Eliza can forgive him for all he’s done, I cannot say I regret a moment of my life.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> (God help and forgive me, Angelica is a fucking queen and I could never do her justice.)


	4. Aaron Burr

_Please, state your name._

 Aaron Burr.

 

_What is success to you?_

Success to me is driving yourself towards a goal, pushing people out of the way if needed, and going all out to get what you want. To be successful, you have to be ready to take a stand for what you believe in, damn the consequences. And—you _can’t_ do it by under-the-table, behind-the-scenes deals, or personal attacks—you can win with blackmail and dirt, but you can’t be successful, because it’ll eventually come back and burn you.

 

_Would you say you achieved what you wanted to in your life? Would you say you have succeeded, by your definition of the word?_

No, I wouldn’t. I spent my life waiting for a chance, waiting for an opening, waiting to see what I would need to do, keeping my cards face-down on the table, and it caused me to lose everything. I fell in love with a married woman, ruined a man’s life, and eventually took him from his family. The only thing I can pride myself on is my dear Theodosia. She was the light of my life, the most intelligent, kind-hearted girl any would ever meet, and I don’t know how I could ever deserve the opportunity to raise her and see her succeed; I suppose her passing was my penance for what I’ve done.

 

_Do you have any regrets, outside of ones previously mentioned?_

I may have mentioned this before, but I have regretted raising my gun and shooting a man I once considered a friend in the ribs  over childish spite. It destroyed my legacy, my life, and ruined countless other’s. You never forget killing a man, and you never could. It is the most unspeakable crime, and your sanity pays the price.

 

_One last thing, before you go—you have alluded to your reservation and diplomacy in life several times today; yet, you show nothing but blunt honesty at the moment. Is there a reason for this?_

There is no time for diplomacy when you have eternity to regret doing so in your life.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> anyone want to talk about hamburr (or just chat) w/ me hmu at lagayette-the-frenchiest-fry on tumblr

**Author's Note:**

> This started as a random drabble about success and ended up a q&a format interview? Comments and kudos are appreciated, and please, please, please give me constructive criticism. My writing could use a lot of work.


End file.
